چند روزی نبودم امیدوارم منو ببخشید.اما حالا با چند تا جوک اومدم.امیدوارم خوشتان بیاید.اگر هم هر کدوم رو متوجه نشدید، بگید. چون به هر حال زبون مادریمون که نیست. راستی نظرتون درباره جکها چیه؟ اگر جالب نیست دیگه جوک ننویسم. به هر حال تصمیم گیری با خودتونه.
A: When I stand on my head the blood rushes to my head, but when I stand on my feet the blood doesn't rush to my feet. Why is this?
B: It's because your feet aren't empty.
A man receives a phone call from his doctor.
The doctor says, "I have some good news and some bad news."
The man says, "OK, give me the good news first."
The doctor says, "The good news is, you have 24 hours to live."
The man replies, "Oh no! If that's the good news, then what's the bad news?"
The doctor says, "The bad news is, I forgot to call you yesterday."
Q: Why did the man throw his watch out of the window?
A: He wanted to see time fly.
This one should be spoken.
Q: How many legs does an ant have?
A: Two, the same as an uncle.
(HINT: ant = aunt)
I was arrested at the airport. Just because I was greeting my cousin Jack!
All that I said was "Hi Jack", but very loud.
Teacher: Rumiko, be careful your purse is open. Someone might take your money!
Rumiko: Oh, no. I left it open so I can get more money.
Teacher: How can you get more money?
Rumiko: The weather report said we would have some change in our weather!
تا بعد، بای
با چند تا اصطلاح پر کاربرد که یادگیری آنها آسان و جذاب هست آشنا شویم
جوجه را آخر پاییز میشمارند don’t count your chickens(before they’re hatched)
آدم شاخ در میاره pigs might fly
روی هم رفته all in all
دود شد رفت هوا disappear/ vanish into thin air
(شانس) چیزی را از دست دادن miss the boat/bus
با چند تا جوک چطورید؟
Teacher: Tell me a sentence that starts with an "I".
Student: I is the...
Teacher: Stop! Never put 'is' after an "I". Always put 'am' after an "I".
Student: OK. I am the ninth letter of the alphabet.
A: What do you call a deer with no eyes?
B: No idea. (No Eye Deer.)
A: What do you call a dead deer with no eyes?
B: Still no idea.
Q: When does the (English) alphabet have only 25 letters?
A: At Christmas time, because it is the time of Noel. (No L)
Patient: Doctor, I have a pain in my eye whenever I drink tea.
Doctor: Take the spoon out of the mug before you drink.
Headmaster: I've had complaints about you, Johnny, from all your teachers. What have you been doing?
Johnny: Nothing, sir.
Headmaster: Exactly.
Mother: "Did you enjoy your first day at school?"
Girl: "First day? Do you mean I have to go back tomorrow?
جالب بود،نه؟
بیایید با چند تا اصطلاح انگلیسی که معادلشان اصطلاحات فارسی خودمان میشود آشنا شویم
با یک تیر دو نشان زدن kill two birds with one stone
سر و گردن بالا تر از بقیه head and shoulders above the resr/other
از چاله به چاه out of the frying pan and into the fire
در ناامیدی بسی امید است every cloud has a silver lining
تا تنور داغه نان را بچسبان strike while the iron is hot
زنگ تفریحی برای یادگیری زبان انگلیسی
امیدوارم لذت ببرید
جدید ترین اثبات ریاضیات:
1)study=don't fail 2)don't study=fail (1)+(2)?study+don't study=don't fail +fail ==> study(1+don't)=fail(1+don't) study=fail so don't study
never kiss a policewoman...she will say stop!! hands up!! . never kiss a doctor,she will say : next please! so always kiss a teacher ... she will say repeat again...!!!
جالب بود نه؟